Perhaps I am old-fashioned, but I am amused when people email me about Romancing the Mouse and say:  “we’ll have to pass on the romance stuff…we’re traveling with her parents (or our kids, or another family).”  I am saddened to realize that these people have no idea what romance is.

 

The essence of romance is:  simple, thoughtful acts, planned in advance. 

 

Don’t hide it, herald it!  It is not at all inappropriate to do romantic things in the presence of her parents (or the kids, or another family).  When done correctly, it will warm the heart of her parents (especially her mother) when they see you making these arrangements.  They will be comforted to know that their daughter is in good hands and will likely become willing accomplices in your schemes.  With regards to children, it is a crucial part of your children’s education that they witness romance being a part of your marriage relationship.  How will they know how to be romantic with their spouses if they have never seen it for themselves?  If you want your children to grow up to be happy and if you want to be truly appreciated by your future son-in-law or daughter-in-law, make sure you teach your children about the real meaning or romance.

 

In fact, the best thing to do is to involve your children in the planning and execution of your romantic schemes. 

 

Example:  Kayla, I want to treat mommy very special tonight and I need your help.  When we come home from the Magic Kingdom, I want you to get ready for bed quickly, without any fussing.  I am going to go into our bathroom and start filling the big bathtub with warm water.  I need you to help me put in the bubble bath and then add the petals from a couple of the roses we got when we arrived.  We’ll set out the candles, turn down the lights and put on some relaxing music.  Then I am going to bring mommy into the bathroom and tell her to relax in the bathtub while you and I get your little brother and you into bed.  This will be a special time for mommy to rest and enjoy the warm water.  Do you think that you can color a picture for her that says “Mommy, Enjoy your special night.  Love, Kayla”?  We can put that on the edge of the bathtub and she will think that is a special gift from you.  Then we are going to put her towel in the dryer so when she is finished with her bath, she has a warm towel to dry off with.  Now it’s very important that you & your brother let mommy sleep late in the morning so I am going to put the Lion King in the DVD player so when you wake up, you can watch it with your brother in the morning.  I’ll put the case right here so you can remember, okay?

 

When Kayla grows up, she will recognize a quality guy when she sees one and her future husband will thank you for teaching her to plan & execute this kind of ‘family tradition’.

 

Other ideas that can be made public:

• Arrange for our Personal Chef to prepare a special candlelight dinner for two on the pool deck and ask her parents to take the children out for pizza or otherwise pre-occupied.
• Tell her mom & dad that you intend to share a bottle of wine and celebrate your 8 year, 4 month, & 5 day anniversary with a special dessert by candlelight in the lanai/pool deck after the kids are put to bed.  Can you try to listen for make sure that we don’t have problems with restless sleepers?
• We’re going to turn in early tonight.  After the kids are in bed, I’m going to set up the massage table and try it out by giving (spouse’s name) a massage.
• While watching TV, bring out a small bottle of moisturizing lotion and sit on the floor while you give your spouse a foot massage using the lotion.  If you really want to blow away everyone, bring a bowl of warm water, mild soap, & soft towel to wash your spouse’s feet before you give them their foot massage.  This heralds back to the biblical ‘washing of your guests feet’, placing you in the position of serving your spouse:  an act of pampering that will not be forgotten.

Click HERE to see the reconnection options at Romancing the Mouse 

For more ideas like this, just ask for our ‘email hints for the romantically-challenged’ or email me directly.